just joined

Arthritis Foundation Forum

Home

Welcome Guest ( Login | Register )

just joined

Rate Topic

Display Mode

Topic Options

Author

Message

Rick8

Posted Tuesday, June 26, 2007 11:37 AM

Group: Forum Members
Last Login: Thursday, July 31, 2008 1:16 PM
Posts: 4, Visits: 0

i am w/m 54, from central ohio. was diagnosed w/ psoriasis around age 5. i have had a symmetrical inverted case of skin lesions, which was manageable. i was diagnosed w/ PA in 2000. i was a cop for 24 yrs, active in martial arts, motorcycles, gardening and wood working. i am married. all joints and tissues are affected from my jaws down to my feet. my hands are useless. all has or will come to an end if i can't figure out my future. besides the issues about which you all have written about, i have issues not mentioned. we lost one of our daughters to breast cancer in 2005. she had no health insurance, so me and my wife liquidated everything for cash to pay for treatments. we lost our home,and due to the depression, my wife lost her job. I tried to keep on working in security to turn things around, but this year, PA kicked me in the butt big time. i have become not much more than an invalid. i cannot work, and am waiting for disability but won't start paying till Sept. if i get it the first time. my wife fell last year, and now we are 1/4 million dollars in debt for an operation that our health insurance co. at the time refused to pay on a "technicality". my wife is back to work, but making less than she was with no health coverage. we have tried some state and federal resources, but we keep getting lost in the red tape. i have had to stop taking all medication including pain meds due to no money and our diet is bad due to lack of same. i handled pain in the martial arts, but after 7 years, my threshold has been surpassed. my future seems dim and useless, i've become a drain on my other kids and my mother. my marriage is at the breaking point, and i dwell on death to stop the pain and trouble i'm causing. i guess i am reaching out one last time for some encouragement(or just getting it all off my chest since me and the wife can't seem to come to terms about this). i guess i really don't expect anything, but thank you for listening. Rick

Post #4084187

Top

Glenda11

Posted Tuesday, June 26, 2007 1:34 PM

Group: Forum Members
Last Login: Thursday, July 31, 2008 1:14 PM
Posts: 26, Visits: 0

I am so sorry to hear about your troubles. It's definately a hard condition to deal with. I myself worked in law enforcement for 8 yrs. Sometimes it was hard to push past the pain. I've had the pain since I was 18 yrs old. I was in a car accident, which I think triggered the PA. I was actually diagnosed w/it approx 2 yrs ago. I'm 30 now. I always thought the pain I had was from the accident. I just recently came on this website myself. I've found that there's alot of good, helpful people on here. I myself don't know much about gov't programs & what-not, but I am willing lend an ear. Good luck! I hope things start going better for you. Just keep your chin up.

Post #4103478

Top

starshine

Posted Wednesday, June 27, 2007 12:38 AM

Group: Forum Members
Last Login: Thursday, November 12, 2009 11:40 PM
Posts: 660, Visits: 603

Rick, I went into a deep depression when I first became ill, had to quit school because I couldn't concentrate on my schoolwork with the thoughts of my illness. I was suicidal and that is what was in my mind almost constantly. I also had no money, no insurance, no husband, and pretty much no place to live. I stayed with family for a while and finally decided that I needed to do what ever I could to treat my arthritis so I could go back to work and school to make a life for myself. I found a free clinic and got on medicine which helped me to accomplish that goal. I now have my disease under control, finished school, have a good job and a wonderful husband. It hasn't been easy living with a chronic disease and a number of other medical problems I won't go into now, but I take one problem at a time.

It seems to me that you need to get your disease under control so you can begin to put the pieces of your life back together.

I can't imagine what it must be like to lose a child. My heart goes out to you.

I wish you the best of luck and let us know how you are doing.

Post #4103479

Top

susaninthegarden

Posted Wednesday, June 27, 2007 10:02 PM

Group: Forum Members
Last Login: Thursday, July 31, 2008 1:14 PM
Posts: 60, Visits: 0

For many I would think the overwhelming debt would blacken the future.
As hard as it is to consider bankruptsy might just help you. You know situations like yours are why they have that out in the first place. Please consider taking advantage of it.

There are clinics and places you can get started on conquering this depression. Clinical depression is pretty hard to solve on your own. There are drug companies that will help you get your meds for free. The Clinic I go to has a sliding scale and when I can't pay anything they do not deny me a doctors visit.
If you take each problem separately it is less daunting that looking at them as a whole. Break them down to doable. Yes you can do that.
I am so sorry you have to deal with the death of a child. It is obvious that you gave everything you had to help her and that says a lot about the kind of person you are. Whatever your daughter said or didn't say I know she was grateful to know you cared. Your sacrifice wasn't for nothing.
You can survive this. Look to your wife. She needs you as much as you need her. Don't let the one person who can understand be shunted aside. And she is not going to feel any better losing both her daughter and her husband.
Give time a chance. Don't look 10 years down the road. Look at tonight and what you can accomplish tonight.
Do something for your wife to make her smile.
There's so much out there. Don't sell yourself short.
Sorry for such a long post but I just couldn't click off knowing how sad you are right now. Give it another chance. ok?

Post #4103480

Top

Rick8

Posted Thursday, June 28, 2007 10:17 PM

Group: Forum Members
Last Login: Thursday, July 31, 2008 1:16 PM
Posts: 4, Visits: 0

thank you all! will keep hanging in there. Rick

Post #4103481

Top

Amy1

Posted Sunday, August 05, 2007 8:22 PM

Group: Forum Members
Last Login: Thursday, July 31, 2008 1:17 PM
Posts: 2, Visits: 0

I first want to start out by saying how sorry I am for the loss of your daughter. In March of this year, I lost my mom the same day I lost my job.

I am 24 years old and have had PA since I was 15. Being a teenager with psoriasis and PA wasn't the easiest thing in the world. When I was 19 I lost my health insurance and went several years without it so i know how you feel. I finally found a job that offered health insurance and got on Enbrel. What a life saver!

Anyways, this year has been total hell for me and I am really surprised that I havent gone completely insane. Literally! In January, my uncle died from complications with diabeties. In February, one of my co-workers died from a heart attack. In March, my mom passed away from a prescription drug overdose. That morning, I was in a meeting at work. They were explaining how our company was shutting down. While in that meeting, my dad and sister kept calling me. Since they usually did that, I didn't think anything of it. When I got out of the meeting and checked my voicemail, I found out that my mother had died. She was only 43 years old. On top of all that, I was having issues with an ovarian cyst. I had a doctors appointment that day that i had to keep to make sure that I was ok. My mom was supposed to come to that appointment with me. A couple days after my mom died, my boyfriend's three month old neice died from heart complications. She was born three months premature. About two weeks after that, my moms dog, that we had for 14 years died from cancer.

The months following that, I just couldn't deal with anything anymore. I had to plan my moms funeral because my dad and sister couldn't hold it together. We had to wait two months for an autopsy report to come back to find out exactly how my mom died. I was jobless with very little income coming in.

Last month I finally said to myself, "O.k. Amy, you haven't gone crazy yet, so before you do, you need to get it together." I started applying for every job that I saw on the internet. I finally found a job that I started last week and I got up the nerve to enroll myself in college to get my bacholer's degree.

All I can say is hang in there. Things will get better. I also agree with what 'susaninthegarden' said about looking to your wife. She really does need you. You need eachother. I'm not sure where you live in Ohio but I did some research. You can go on www.firstlink.org. They can help provide you with listings to free clinics in Franklin County. If you don't live near there, just go on to www.google.com and type in your city + free clinics and you will get some really good links to web sites that can help.

Post #4103482

Top

Nette Lee

Posted Friday, August 29, 2008 3:57 PM

Group: Forum Members
Last Login: Friday, August 29, 2008 4:12 PM
Posts: 2, Visits: 3

{{{{{{{Rick!!}}}}}}}}

First, oh ... so sorry to read about your daughter. I can't imagine the heartbreak you and your wife suffered from such a loss.

Second ... ditto on the death as an escape plan. I think that is just a testimony to how much you have endured all ready. It takes so much of a person's available resources to cope with continual pain ... it isn't too long before the gauge is BELOW empty. You've got some GREAT advice already on how to start to refill that tank ... I can't add any more. Just want you to know you are understood.

=D

Nette

Post #4154252

Top

tammy piercy

Posted Tuesday, May 12, 2009 10:22 PM

Group: Forum Members
Last Login: Friday, May 29, 2009 12:11 PM
Posts: 6, Visits: 10

I understand how you feel. I am a mom a 6 1/2 yr old boy just diagnosised with psoriosis. It really stinks he was never sick before. this all comes to close to a similar loss as yours. We lost our daughter at the age of 15 to epilepsy. I have had much saddness. I want to help him but don't know how. do blame my self. He also has insurance issuses cause he is not my current huddy's son. He is on state which don't know what they will or wont do for him. We are not rich by any means. The only advise I can give is keep your chin up things will hopefully turn for the better. Also have 2 other specail needs children. GOD only gives you what he thinks you can handle.

Post #4203276

Top

starshine

Posted Saturday, May 16, 2009 6:16 AM

Group: Forum Members
Last Login: Thursday, November 12, 2009 11:40 PM
Posts: 660, Visits: 603

Tammy, so sorry to hear about your little one. The Psoriasis foundation has a board like this on also. Have you been there? www.psoriasis.org is the link. I post on there frequently, too, as I also have psoriasis. I have RA too. I have a rare form of psoriasis called palmoplantar pustular psoriasis (ppp). It is in complete remission with Methotrexate. Good luck with your family. You certainly have your hands full. Pinch

Post #4203841

Top

« Prev Topic | Next Topic »

All times are GMT -5:00, Time now is 6:54pm

Execution: 0.530. 71 queries. Compression Disabled.